On this chapter of The Queerest Things I Watched Last Week, I fall in love with Theo and Trish on The Haunting of Hill House, 9-1-1 turns up the drama, and #ThunderGrace is back on Black Lightning.
- 9-1-1 – Season 2 Episode 5 “Awful People” [Live]
Oh, y’all, there was some good Hen and Ren drama on this episode!
When the picnic scene with Hen, Ren and Michael started up I was like, “Oh, cute it’s Big Gay Picnic!” Just like the Big Gay Dinner on Wynonna Earp, all the regular/recurring queer characters ate together.
But then, look who shows up! It’s Hen’s baby mama, ex-inmate and ex-girlfriend Eva who she cheated on Karen with last season.
Ooooh, Eva, what are you doing creeping around Hen, Ren and Denny? Big Gay Picnic sees this and gets the kids away from Eva. Karen looks like she’s ready to fight her.
Oh, damn! Mia and I were screaming at this point; we love it when a show brings the dyke drama.
Eva also brought Denny’s biological father, Nathaniel, who Hen didn’t even know existed. Eva lied to Hen and told her she didn’t know who the bio father was and he didn’t know he had a biological son until now.
Okay, pause. If Hen “didn’t know who the father was,” then this means Denny was not planned. So did Hen meet her while she was pregnant? Later we learn Eva and Nathaniel met at rehab so I guess she got knocked up then and met Hen soon after that?
Anyway, now he knows and is perceived as a threat to Hen and Ren’s parenthood.
But would he be really? Eva signed away her parental rights when she went to prison. I assume at that point, Karen either second parent or step-parent adopted Denny. If Hen was already Denny’s legal parent when she was with Eva, that would make Hen and Ren Denny’s current legal parents. I guess a bio father who got the news he was a kid’s dad, could step in and sue for some kind of custody. I couldn’t imagine him getting very far if the kid was older and in a happy home.
I’ll stop with the gay parentsplaining — back to the drama!
Later, Karen gets off the phone with their lawyer and tells Hen, “We’re screwed.” Karen is pissed and mad at Hen for bringing that jailbait bitch back into their lives in the first place. Hen apologizes for the millionth time, but Karen is understandably still angry. This is a pretty giant mess they are in.
So how does Hen try to fix things? She stalks Eva! Hen sits in her car and watches Eva buy some drugs and take it into her hotel room. Why are you doing this, Hen? Creeping around Eva is what got you into this mess in the first place!
While she’s sitting in the car, Karen calls her.
Eek, Hen is lying to Karen about where she is! Why is this happening? This can’t be a good idea. Also, do people in LA really go for a drive to clear their heads? Driving in LA sounds stressful not calming.
Hen gets out of the car, goes up to Eva’s hotel room and starts pounding on the door until she hears a crash inside. Hen breaks the door open and finds Eva ODing on the floor. Hen takes out her phone to call 9-1-1 but then hesitates. I imagine she is thinking this could all go away if she just lets her OD.
Hen doesn’t go through with it, thank goodness, and calls 9-1-1. The paramedics come, give Eva some Narcan, and she is saved.
Wow, Eva just does not stop. Hen calls Eva’s parole officer and she’s going back to jail.
Towards the end of the episode we have a montage set to folksy music, with Athena giving a Grey’s Anatomy style voice over that includes Eva going to jail and Nathaniel meeting with Hen and Ren.
Gosh, that was easy. I thought we were going to drag this custody thing out for multiple episodes. I am relieved that wont be the case.
Whew that was a lot! I guess Eva being in jail means things will be more chill for the Hen and Ren family.
- Black Lightning – Season 2 Episode 2 “The Book of Consequences: Chapter Two: Black Jesus Blues” [Live]
I was excited for this episode because I knew there was going to be some #ThunderGrace drama.
Anissa took Jennifer’s “you need get back out there before you dry up” advice and went out to see a singer named Zoe B. Zoe is playing this really mellow, acoustic song, but Anissa is rocking out while everyone else is gently swaying. It was so strange and really funny.
Anissa, are you listening to another song we can’t hear? That, and the jumpsuit, cracked us up.
After Zoe was done singing, Anissa wasted zero time, made her way through the crowd and started chatting her up.
Omg, that line, Anissa.
Anissa then proceeds to tell her what happens.
Goodness, that sounds like a scene from a porn movie. Did a dude write that line? I know Anissa is going through an overconfident phase, but women are so rarely this aggressive with other women.
I wonder if young queer folks see all these ladies aggressively flirting and hooking up with each other and think that’s how the majority of queer women are in real life. They’ll be in for a shock when they find out the reality is you can go on multiple dates with a girl and not know if you’re actually dating or not.
Anissa spends the night with Zoe, but even though Zoe has “a million songs and a closet full of heels.” Anissa has to get to class and not even a ride on a private jet for dim sum in NYC entices her to skip.
Before she leaves, Zoe tells Anissa that she’s having a party tomorrow and she needs to come.
Anissa does come to Zoe’s party the next day and guess who’s on the catering staff — our girl Grace. Grace sees Anissa and Zoe together and Anissa gives her a casual, “hey, girl!” wave. Grace is not amused.
Later, Anissa finds Grace and tries to talk to her like everything’s casual. Grace is not having it.
I’m confident these two will be together again, but it looks like Anissa has to evolve from her current overconfident self first.
- The Haunting of Hill House – Season 1 Episode 3 “Touch” [Streaming]
The Haunting of Hill House was my newest TV obsession last week.
At its foundation is a really well-done drama. Dramas are my favorite type of show to watch — I love shows with intriguing relationships. Added to that is the horror genre, which I am not as into, but it’s so incredibly well written, shot and acted, I wound up enjoying that part too.
The show follows a group of five siblings, who mirror my wife and her siblings: two brothers and three sisters, one of whom is a lesbian. They all grew up in what is considered the most haunted house in America in the world of the show.
Each kid is affected by the house in a different way. The lesbian and middle child, Theo, has the ability to know what people are feeling from touching them, and because she has this ability, she wears gloves most of the time to prevent it from happening. It also gives her the classic, “lesbian with intimacy issues” trope.
In episode one we learn she is queer right away when she hooks up with a woman named Trish at a club.
Theo takes her home and after they’re done doin’ it, Theo makes it clear to Trish that it’s time to leave. Trish seems pretty bummed about it.
Many of the episodes focus on a different family member and episode three is the one that focuses on Theo.
In this episode, we learn via flashback Theo came out to her siblings when she banged one of the bridesmaids at her sister, Nell’s, wedding.
Later, Theo’s back at the club and sees Trish but completely ignores her. I guess she then has a change of heart, because a few days later, Theo calls Trish and invites her over.
Trish comes over even though Theo kicked her out after sex and then ignored her completely — that’s some dedication. I guess you can’t help it if you’re attracted to the emotionally guarded girl with magic hands.
Immediately after she arrives, Theo wants to make out, but Trish wants to talk. Trish is like, “I’m glad you called, but you completely ignored me at the club.” Theo apologizes, but then obviously hasn’t taken the Lesbian Processing 101 course.
Theo then proceeds to tell Trish all about her day. She spills out a lot of dark stuff that happened at her job as a child psychiatrist.
I guess that did the job for Trish and she was ready to make out again.
You’ll have to watch to see what happens to Theo and Trish, I don’t want to give it all away.
If you’re the kind of person who avoids horror, I can tell you the show is mostly straight up drama with jump scares and creepy stuff thrown in here and there. It’s not like American Horror Story where it’s nonstop gore. I know I’m not the best judge though because I have a high scare tolerance, but this show is so good I think most folks should give it a try.
Also, Mika (who does not like scary movies) and I loved the show and Theo and Trish so much, we gave it the coveted “show we love” designation.
- American Horror Story – Season 8 Episode 6 “Return to Murder House” [Live]
Speaking of horror, this year’s AMS is like a big crossover of different seasons.
This episode, which is also Sarah Paulson’s directing debut, is a mashup between Murder House and Coven. It was fun to go back to a very self-aware Murder House and see those characters again.
Unfortunately Murder House gets bought by a queer couple, Grace and Elizabeth.
As soon as we saw them my wife and I were like, “Dead lesbians.”
They are both killed by Michael Langdon immediately upon moving in. Michael is the antichrist, and after they turn into ghosts, Michael incinerates their ghost selves.
So they’re twice dead and the 14th and 15th dead queer female character on TV in 2018.
- Supergirl – Season 4 Episode 2 “Fallout” [Live]
Nia was a hero this episode and we haven’t even seen her in a super suit yet!
After the president was exposed as an alien, there has been a lot of anti-alien sentiment in National City. While Brainy is buying pizzas for the office at his usual pizza place, a computer hack causes his device that makes him look human fail and the pizza dude sees his alien self.
Pizza guy is an alienphobe and threatens Brainy with a baseball bat. Nia, who is there for coffee, steps in to stop him
Nia makes dude give Brainy his stack of pizzas and as they’re walking out, he tells Nia that she looks familiar and asks her if he knows her. She replies she doesn’t think so. And then I think Brainy tries to ask her out.
Nia is pretty much like, “Google me, you’ll find me.” But that look on Brainy’s face makes me think he knows her from the future. I’m very intrigued! I hope we get to see a Nia/Brainy date soon.
When Nia gets back to the office, she tells James about the assault and insists he make an official statement on the anti-alien violence happening in the city. He tries to dodge her request and she comes out to him to try to get him to see the severity of the situation.
Oh my goodness, this was so amazing. I felt like I was watching history being made and imagined transgender kids at home watching Supergirl and feeling represented for the first time.
James is still not getting it. He tells her he’s “been doing this for a long time” and needs to stay balanced in his reporting.
Nia then says this.
I agree, there are no “two sides to the story” when it comes to innocent people being discriminated against and assaulted just for being who they are.
I love Nia so much! Her story line is my favorite thing on the show right now.
PS: Now I’m craving pizza.
- Charmed – Season 1 Episode 2 “Let This Mother Out” [Live]
The sisters are trying to figure out if Harry, their Whitelighter (guardian angel who protects and guides witches), is lying to them since a being who identified themselves as their mother told them he can’t be trusted via a Ouija board.
Macy creates a truth serum and brings it home at the very same time Niko comes over with lunch and a present for Mel.
Of course, Niko’s travel mug looks exactly like the one Macy put the truth serum in.
This means Niko gets the serum and Macy takes her tea.
Mel is happy for the visit and the extra pickles.
And the present.
I think I got that album when it came out.
Niko’s gotta get back to the station, but before she leaves, it looks like she wants to tell Mel something.
Don’t worry, whatever it is is going to spill right out after she drinks the serum.
And it does.
Rut ro, looks like someone had some ex-sex while Melko was on a break.
Mel starts telling Maggie all about it when she gets home, but there’s no time to process. They need to release their mother from the Ouija board.
Turns out, that wasn’t their real mom, much to the surprise of no one watching, and Harry is a good guy after all.
After fake mom is defeated, Maggie is ready to dish out advice on the Greta situation.
At the end of the episode, Mel is on the phone with Niko, and it seems like she doesn’t remember anything she said while on the serum.
I’m glad Mel took Maggie’s advice and decided to let it go. I wonder if Niko is going to put fake glasses back on.
Tonight it’s the Legends of Tomorrow season four premiere! I seriously haven’t been looking forward to the return of a show this much since the Orphan Black days. I can not wait!